Grammar and Punctuation

Memories that Last Forever

Shown Improvement on Objective

Explanation:

I ranked myself with “shown improvement on objective,” because I have gotten better with punctuation through out this year however, I still have some errors. I definitely have lots of room on improvement with this because I still have a hard time deciding if I’m putting punctuation in the right spot. In this paper in the third and fourth paragraphs, I had some comma errors such as, “The only things I still clearly remember were the screams of pain and agony coming from my mom and brothers. As well as, police sirens and lights showing up on a regular basis.” When it should be more like this, “The only things I still clearly remember were the screams of pain and agony coming from my mom and brothers, as well as police sirens and lights showing up on a regular basis.” These are small errors but could completely change the meaning of the paper if used completely wrong which is likely to happen. I am still working on this and have to improve before I can be moved to the completely meets objective ranking.

Big Picture Revisions and Small Revisions

Youths in the Foster Systems

Meets Objective

Explanation:

I ranked myself “meets objective,” because this piece took a lot of revisions and they made my piece sound more academic and more interesting. I am not a master because I definitely have room to improve. I got a decent grade on this paper but because of the many revisions I had to make. I was able to go from this to this. I also made small revisions such as changing my transitions from saying that “youths are also seen as disposable because they aren’t given money once they age out,” to, “Youths that are coming to the age of “aging out,” gain no money to help support their basic needs. These youths often struggle to find food, shelter, and other basic needs without financial support.” This wasn’t much growth but I did feel like I improved instead of staying the same by changing the topic suddenly with no reason. I have room for more improvement, but I changed a lot already this year and am willing to learn new ideas to make me improve even more as a writer.

Disposable People Ideas

I feel like the children in foster systems are seen as disposable. They aren’t thought about a lot because many people don’t see what actually goes on during their time in the foster system. We don’t see what goes on during their lives because we don’t think about what they have to go through. Some children have to leave their biological families and they don’t get to take anything to keep them warm of healthy. They don’t get to have their toys and they sometimes even have to be separated from their siblings. The state doesn’t give much money to the children who have to completely start their lives over. The children get forgotten about because they aren’t the center of attention when they need it most. Most kids get forgotten when they age out of the system. They don’t receive money and and they don’t get taken care of. They have to go out and find their own home when they were never really taught how to live a good life. They have major difficulties transitioning into the world by themselves and not having anyone there for them to rely on.

Academic Writing

Youths in the Foster Systems

Meets Objective

Explanation:

I ranked myself as “meets objective,” because I was able to use research and apply it to something that meant a lot to me. I was able to put real facts down and show how this is a struggle in todays society. I used many different sources and I was able to get a decent grade on my paper, which shows that I was able to put meaning into the research. I would say I am a master at putting meaning to my research because at some places in this paper I don’t make a lot of sense with explaining what the quote has to do with anything. I could improve on that as well as some other places in order to reach the mastering of the objective. A place that I could do better with my quote integration is in the second to last paragraph, ““Educational achievement escapes many of these youth, with completion rates of high school as low as 34%.” (Reilly, Thorn 728). These youths don’t have anyone to encourage him or her to stick with it.” I could make the integration better by making the quote mean something significant instead of making it sound like I don’t care a lot about this topic when I really do.

 

Creative Writing

Nightmares Coming to Life

Meets Objective

Explanation:

I rank myself as “meets objective” for this objective. I think that my creative piece had good word choice. I also think my piece was descriptive and that the descriptions helped show the story instead of just telling it. I think this is one of my best areas of writing because I can write about anything to make it creative and it comes easily to me. I feel like the creative pieces that I write about myself come the easiest because I experienced what I’m writing about instead of making it up. In my piece, “Nightmares Coming to Life”, I was able to be descriptive in the second paragraph, by saying, “I trudged my way in, plopped down and started putting on my basketball shoes.” I was able to show that I was tired and somewhat dreading going to practice that day. Another way I showed something in a creative way was, “There was no blood, but as I pulled my hands away, I saw it laying there so pure and clean, my tooth.” This make it sound a little suspenseful of what that object could be and I doesn’t just flat out say that it was my tooth at first.

Found Poem

Katrina Staab
Mr. Stoltenow
English 2
2 September 2016
Found Poem

I am delighted,
For the promise,
For something new.
Everybody who starts something,
Wonder,
What the next place
Will be like.

What a man wants more than anything
Else in the world,
Is a friend who will stand by him,
To do things with.
They must think,
Avoid the mistakes.
Let them have their own way.

Life would be different,
A better world is important to have
It is more important to render life.
Someday you will come together,
Stand with glad confidence.
The best gift is not life,
It’s blessing and comfort to others.

Speech:

Helen Keller

“Knights of the Blind”

Knights of the Blind, I salute you!

I am delighted to participate with you in the Lions International Week for the Blind. This week for the Blind is an event full of promise for thousands of handicapped people.

There is always a sense of adventure in a new enterprise, and the Lions’ way of serving the blind is something new in the world. I think nearly everybody who starts something is a good deal like a traveller in a strange land. We wonder what the next place will be like, and what kind of people we shall meet; and ever there is the unexpected — the hope that an event out of the common may happen.

I began by saying that the Lions’ attitude towards the blind is something new in the world. What I mean is the Lions are trying to help the blind as they would help one of their own number who had met with a misfortune, and not as people different from everyone else. The usual attitude of the seeing man emphasizes the difference between himself and his blind neighbor. If he would only stop for a moment and try to imagine what it would be like not to see, how he would feel if an accident dashed the light out of his eyes! Of course it would not change him in any respect, except to make everything in life harder for him. Mentally, morally, emotionally he is the same man as he was before the accident. He would like to go on with his work if that were possible. He suffers terribly because of his helplessness. He finds himself out of a job, out of luck, dependent on others. Pity does not help much in such a situation, and mere charity is degrading.

What such a man wants more than anything else in the world is a friend who will stand by him through the period of readjustment. He must learn how to live in the dark, how to do things with his hands, how to find his way about, and usually he must learn a new way of earning his daily bread. Because the Lions are active, and many of them young and intelligent, they have grasped the situation, I think. That is why the Lions are going to be a power for good in the work for the sightless.

To do anything well, we must first get a right concept of what we are aiming at. We must think right before we can act right. Keep the blind before your mind’s eye as people just like yourselves, and you will avoid the mistakes that are so often made by those who started out to assist the blind. Do not think “the poor things” will all want to read the same books, or engage in the same kind of occupations, or marry the same kind of women. The Lions can build up in the business world an intelligent valuation of the capabilities of the blind. The employer should not lower his standard of efficiency to meet the requirements of people without sight. If they can do a job at all, they should be held to the prevailing standard. They are just average human beings. If you coddle them, and let them have their own way in everything, they become spoilt, and behave like irresponsible children, just as you would do under similar circumstances.

Another mistake to be deplored is, many blind youths receive excellent vocational training in the schools for the sightless, and are not able to utilize it. Thousands of dollars are expended on their education. They devote years to the study of music, and when they leave school there is nothing for them to do but go into the semi-charitable workshops for the blind. This is a waste of money, time, capacity. If these young people were assisted until positions could be found for them, life would be different for many of them.

It is hard enough for people with all their faculties to succeed in life alone, and it is almost impossible for the blind to win their way without the right kind of help. We, blind and seeing — we are all parts of a great whole, and we depend one upon another. This thought is at the foundation of our institutions, our civilization and our homes. Beneath the superstructure of our civic life there are thousands of devoted men and women giving of their very best towards this principle of cooperation, and whose joy is service to their fellow creatures. It is in this capacity of upbuilders (sic) of a better world that we meet here tonight.

It is important to aid those who have been wounded on the battlefields of life. It is still more important, more intelligent to render life safe and sweeter for coming generations, and that is what prevention of blindness and other physical disasters means. I rejoice that the Lions International has manifested such earnestness in the movement for the conservation of human eyesight. This is the rallying-point of progress. It has taken centuries to bring about the wrong conditions which have resulted in so much suffering. We cannot hope to abolish these conditions in a day; but if we all brace ourselves for a long, grim fight against ignorance and wrong living, we shall not only save men’s faculties, we shall also build up a saner, nobler civilization for the future.

Some day you will come together again here in this beautiful capital of our country, and look over the field of your endeavors. If I am alive then, I shall stand before you with glad confidence and say to you: “Well done, good and faithful Knights of the Blind,” and you will say with equal joy, “We have received as richly as we have given.” Thus we come to the conclusion of it all, that in every useful work the best gift is not in admiration or endowment, but in the life and character which pours out of its spiritual wealth and power blessing and comfort to others. This is a proud moment for me because I feel that I am one in a valiant crusade of fifty thousand Lions to arouse nation-wide interest in the blind and the best way of helping them to help themselves. Again, I salute you, Knights of the Blind, torch-bearers in darkness. I thank you.

Of Mice and Men Questions

Katrina Staab

English 10

30 October 2016

Part 1:

1.

The cause of making a character disposable is when the character doesn’t fit in. They are used in the story but people treat them like they don’t matter. They see these characters as less than what they really are.

Lennie is an example of a character who is disposable. He is seen as someone who is less then anyone else because of the way he acts. However, there are a few other characters that are seen as disposable such as Crooks. Crooks is disposable in this book because of his race. He comes across as less because of his skin color. These people around him don’t like being around him because he is black. On page 66, they describe him by saying, “Crooks, the negro stable buck.” He is called a name that is disrespectful about his skin color. He is seen to be less because of his skin color along with him being cripple. People are seen as less when they have something visibly wrong with them.

Crooks’ being disposable is justified when he talked about how he is unwanted. On page

68 he says, “‘Cause I’m black. They play cards in there, but I can’t play because I’m black. They say I stink. Well, I tell you, all of you stink to me. Other people don’t treat him respectfully. They don’t include him simply because of his race.

In the section where you learn about crooks, there is imagery. On page 66, it says,

“There were cans of saddle soap and a drippy can of tar with its paintbrush sticking over the edge.” You can visualize what is being talked about. Also, the point of view in this book is 3rd person. It uses he, she, it, him, he, etc.

2.

I think that this book is titled with a name that fits very well. At first when you think about it, it might not make sense. However, there are some things that are somewhat parallel in the poem and the book. They have different meanings for some things but there are some that are similar.

The poem reminds me of the book when I see the lines, “Thou need na start awa sae hasty, Wi’ bickering brattle!” When I look at the original writing it doesn’t make sense however I looked at the modern English translation and it says, “Why dash away, so quick, so rash, in a frenzied flash.” It relates to when Lennie and George ran away from Weed. They left quickly without going back. They needed to leave. They were scurrying away from things that were troubling them just like the mouse is running away from the farmer in the poem.

When I saw the part of the poem where it says, “An forward, tho’ I canna see, I guess an’ fear!” It reminds me of the part where George had just shot Lennie. People were looking at him. Also, George would have been terrified because he just shot the person that the other people were looking for.

There is setting in this book. They are on a ranch in the Salinas valley. There is also symbolism. The rabbits along with the ranch that they want to get symbolize and dream of freedom. They want to be free from having to find work and getting into trouble. Part 2:

A dream that was shown in this book is Lennie and George wanting to get a ranch and Lennie wanting to tend rabbits. They want it so that they don’t have to work at the ranch anymore. They want to be able to not worry about getting into trouble. They want to be by themselves with this ranch where they can make money off of that instead of working for other people. The spark of the dream is when they first talk about what they want to do. On page 14, they say, “An’ live off the fatta the lan’.” They want to get that house and everything else.

The blaze of the dream is when they bring it up again, but in front of Candy. Candy get involved and excited about this plan. They talk about how in about a month they will have enough money to get that ranch and leave. Candy even offer to help pay for it just as long and he can get out of working where they are currently. Candy also says on page 59, ” I’d make a will an’ leave my share to you guys in case I kick off, ’cause I ain’t got no relatives nor nothing.”

He talks about how he is willing to help them and write his will to them if they would be willing

to let him go along too.

The dying of the flame happens when Lennie kills the puppy and Curley’s wife. Lennie says on page 87, “George ain’t gonna let me tend no rabbits now.” He knew that he had done a bad thing with both the dog and Curley’s wife. He knew that the dream wasn’t going to come true because they were going to have to leave. He felt bad and he wanted the dream just like George and he killed the dream just like a flame dies.

On page 93, there is personification when the book says, “But the barn was alive now.”

This is personification because a barn can’t be alive which is giving a non-human thing, human like characteristics. Another device is dialogue. This shows how the people talk and it shows you what kind of a personality they have.